It is important to note that there has been no activity on her phone, bank accounts, or social media accounts since Sept. 30. Throughout the years, Ive engaged in self-injurious behaviors. Sydney West is from Chapel Hill, North Carolina, but also grew up in the Pleasanton area. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Email: joshua.bote@sfgate.com and Signal: 707-742-3756, Six months after student's disappearance in San Francisco, family continues search, Horoscope for Saturday, 3/04/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Snowboarder dies at Tahoe ski resort following historic blizzard, West I-80 closed near Tahoe due to snow and 'multiple spinouts', Wife of Jeffrey Vandergrift issues somber update, Even Salesforces tower HQ isnt safe from office cuts, Inside Harry and Meghans favorite In-N-Out, Horoscope for Friday, 3/03/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Massive Lake Tahoe waterfront compound slashes price by $20M, This beloved East Bay hybrid cafe and bike shop is closing, Ja Morant says he'll get help after video shows apparent gun. "We know that there was a lot of pedestrian, car and bicycle traffic on the Golden Gate Bridge the morning Sydney disappeared. If you havent already joined a support group for other suicide loss survivors, that might help you; such groups are available in person and online. Upon its completion in 1937, it was the tallest and longest suspension bridge in the world. For example, upon hearing me take total responsibility for the failure of my first marriage a gifted woman who is a counselor and pastor said, I typically find that both parties share responsibility equally. Good luck to you, Joan. That is so sad, Julie. Seidens study shows that those who encounter a personal, human intervention during the suicide attempt are less likely to end up dying of suicide (though he admits that another big percentage continue self-destructive behaviorse.g., excessive drinkingthat lead to an early natural death), but it says nothing about the efficacy of physical barriers. Thank you for sharing, Stacy. True or false is a perception that changes from person to person. But the other day I told him that and now hes moving in with me again so my life is going good again! Anyone in the Bay Area with any information regarding her disappearancecan contact Sgt. Here I thought I just occasionally drank too much. In Mental Health circles there is a saying , that Sometimes suicide is inevitable. Someone mustve seen something nothing is being ruled out. Her family has stated that she enjoyed the area around the Golden Gate Bridge, and it was not unlike her to take pictures and go for a walk or run. The Suicide Deterrent System, also known as the Safety Net, is being constructed to keep people from jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge. As well, though, I believe I may have accidentally given myself something like ECT. Sign up for free Patch newsletters and alerts. Children are a major reason for living for many people who battle suicidal thoughts. I hear you. Please enter valid email address to continue. I tried to commit suicide when I was 18. Rhodes was the 90th person to jump to their death from the bridge in its short 11 year history, but the first who wanted to survive. Holidays and milestones come and go while we continue to feelSydney's absence continuously. Her Disappearance: Sydney West was a 19-year-old freshman at U.C. Somehow I survived. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. So there are many, many more medications and medication combinations that he can try. More often than not, the crisis passes. T he Golden Gate Bridge is one of the top suicide sites in the world, surpassed only by the Yangtze River Bridge in Nanjing, China.People have jumped off of the bridge for nearly as long as it's been accessible to the public; the first recorded suicide a World War I veteran suspected to have suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder took place less than three months after the . Your pain matters. They then examine the demographic characteristics of those who commit suicide from the bridge as well as the fatal attraction of the Golden Gate Bridge. 18 I held a gun to my head in my backyard w my finger on the trigger. The details of your life will, of course, be different but we have our humanness in common. Edit: FAQs https://findsydneywest.com/faq, https://www.pollyklaas.org/missing-children/sydney-west/, https://pleasantonweekly.com/news/2021/09/30/what-a-week-find-sydney-west, https://www.kron4.com/news/bay-area/searching-for-sydney-san-francisco-police-still-asking-for-publics-help/?fbclid=IwAR2uVE3anCjr5EvpUerTiD6JZxCAENR83-xIRz3TRzAfRuGckyYFzRqnobM, https://storiesoftheunsolved.com/2020/11/27/the-disappearance-of-sydney-west/. Even though 2/3 are started by women, Virtually every article is written by women. People are stupid. I am sure your little self felt am I not lovable enough but it was never about you, your mum was in pain and obviously thought you would be better off without her, but it is not a reflection on you, hard to accept as children are programmed to feel the centre of the world. Get browser notifications for breaking news, live events, and exclusive reporting. It certainly sounds like your friends antidepressants are not working. Anyone with information about Sydneys whereabouts is asked to contact private investigator Scott Dudek by texting or calling 925-705-8328. Im about to be 22, medicated trying to live normal with constant suicidal thoughts. I am resigned to staying alive until I die in some other way. There are some reports that Sydney may have suffered from depression. Theyre asking anyone "who may have been walking, biking, running, who commute over the bridge particularly Wednesday mornings at that time" to share information if they might have seen West or anything that can help locate the missing teen. If you want to talk with someone immediately by phone, text, or chat, please check out the Resources page. "There were many people in that vicinity during that time," said Mr. West. She took a ride-share service. God Bless You. As a person who has tried countless times to end my life, even shooting myself in the head, we are stuck living with yet another feeling of failure when we fail and continue suffering. Wests parents said they have now hired a private investigator who is working with the San Francisco Police Department and Orange County (North Carolina) Sheriffs Department. West had just gone off to college to her dream school, University of California Berkeley. It's not hard to kill yourself at the Golden Gate bridge. The suicide barrier on the Sydney Harbour Bridge simply rerouted jumpers to a cliff popularly known as The Gap. Its always women telling men what we should be. Dusty thought he could do the same but let everyone see it, and so employed the services of his pal, Hollywood cameraman Jose Guzman, to capture the jump on film. There are so many types of antidepressants these days (around 40), plus mood stabilizers, plus antipsychotic medications that can also be used to treat depression. But overall, the evidence is that prevention is not simply a temporary delay of death. For suicidal individuals and their loved ones, survivors, mental health professionals, & others who care, Although severe depression led him to jump off the bridge, Kevin Hines, Yet it gives me great hope that the vast majority of suicide attempt survivors remain just that survivors. Everything says Get help. The night before she disappeared (Sept. 29) she and her father Jay West had a lengthy phone conversation according to her family. He had lost two fingers in a knife fight on the set of the movie "Scarface." what can I do. of the different medications. Thats why I searched for answers and I found this site. There is only a 4ft safety rail separating the sidewalk from the void, and 98% of suicide attempts there have succeeded. When I arrived at the #FindSydneyWest vigil in Pleasanton, I said whoever is singing has a beautiful voice. That is no way to live, but that is the reality. But in reality, he cant know what the future holds. Thank you for providing this site. Praying for you. Its a really simple concept. I am not sure anybody really wants to die but I know many people, including myself, who are just sick and tired of living and want it to be over. At times I hate myself. "I just want to reach out to all the folks that have been supporting us over the past almost month now, communicate that the support and the love that we get is just absolutely amazing," Wests dad, Jay West, said in the clip. You can read more about this at http://www.bmj.com/content/341/bmj.c4447. Here Are My Reasons. Police do not necessarily believe there was foul play involved, according to an interview Rueca had with KRON4. I understand completely. She was said to be very close with her family. I know how hard it is. Leads continue to come in, her parents said. I still think about suicide, although not as often. I once attributed that simply to having realized I wanted to live and (narrowly) surving my attempt. He might also have refused to remove the gun from the home, too. Construction of the Golden Gate Bridge suicide net, a coarse web of steel designed to catch and cradle people who jump, is two years behind . Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Learn how your comment data is processed. They understand the battle with weight loss and a zillion other things but not suicide. PART OF AUDACY NEWS. Her family launched a website,findsydneywest.com, that they hope will remind the community Sydney is still missing. Confessed to my dad and got shipped to a hospital. This research, though 35 years old, still holds true. Privacy Policy. There are many people with children whose pain or distorted thinking overrides all else, in spite of their best wishes. Had she jumped somebody definitely would have noticed, and it would've been caught on CCTV (the cameras are placed on light poles so fog does not block). The night before she disappeared (Sept. 29) she and her father Jay West had a lengthy phone conversation according to her family. ChiMaxx, thank you for writing and for raising important points in your comment. My family lied to me about basically everything relevant and valuable in life. Both my son and I said we woud never consider it again, after that. She is an amazing musician. He had a gun in the house that he never used, was trying to sell, I didnt even think of it during this time. Rhodes had been seeking fame all his life, and successfully became one of Hollywoods first stuntmen, appearing in movies such as "Under Arizona Skies" and "Duel in the Sun," in which he performed a cliff jump. All rights reserved. He completed the challenge and won himself a taxi ride to New York. I wanted to distance myself from it as much as I could so that people would leave me alone. Key to my recovery was becoming realistic about my part in creating the calamity called my life, but also needed to recognize others responsibilities as well. But I have. Rhodes was estranged from his wife Lorraine, who lived in the East Bay in Port Chicago with their two kids, Rocky, 4, and Oowala, 9, but he made arrangements for her to witness the stunt, maybe in the hope that the feat would win her back. I hope you believe your words here, or at least are beginning to. She struggled with being so far away from her parents and sister, who reside in North Carolina. Her Disappearance: Sydney West was a 19-year-old freshman at U.C. We certainly do need to continue educating people about suicide prevention, including the reality that most people who survive a suicide attempt choose life afterwards. According to Find Sydney West, there is a $25,000 reward for information that leads to finding Syd, who is described as 5'10 tall and about 130 pounds with blue eyes and blonde hair. I was driving toward the Hoover Dam bypass bridge from Memphis over 4 years ago to jump off. At the time of her disappearance Sydney was 5 feet 10 inches tall, weighs around 130 pounds with light brown hair and blue eyes. Many self harm injuries, stitches. I worry almost everyday that Ill maim myself again and not die. Thanks again. (felt good to be honest for once). He traveled from L.A. to San Francisco days before the jump to prepare, and holed up in the Grand Southern Hotel on Mission Street with his cameraman to wait for a clear day so the footage would look beautiful when it was watched on news channels from coast to coast. He managed to turn himself upright in the few seconds it took for him to hit the water; this way, he did not land on his head. I blame myself 100% for her suicide. Thank you. In 2013, 118 potential jumpers were talked down from their attempts and did not jump. My failure as a person was responsible for my extreme step. Well living isnt what its cracked up to be. 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